Mad Scientist at Work

 How mad scientists enjoy themselves (when not wreaking havoc on an unsuspecting, though deserving, world. 


The Curse of the Maladroit Penguin 5

Platypuses are occasionally mistaken for the Supreme Being by people who have been attacked by drop bears. This was expected.


Migrating Snowmen

 Spring has again returned.

The Earth is like a child that knows many poems.

--Rainer Maria Rilke



The Curse of the Maladroit Penguin 3

In which an unhappy Mom wishes for grandchildren. "Thinking can only serve to measure out the helplessness of thought." --H. Rider Haggard

The Curse of the Maladroit Penguin 2

In which the quest begins.

"I go to see the shadow you have become."

--Stéphane Mallarmé


The Curse of the Maladroit Penguin

Episode 1 of a thrilling tale of adventure and of Brussels sprouts featuring Demo Version, a child of two super accountants, a brave duck who refused the sacred abacus of the accounting guild and chose to take up a life of adventure in the service of Vlod Ironbeak, the vampire mayor of Toronto (not THAT Toronto!) 

Also starring Nina, formerly known as the Lady of the Lake, now known as the Lady of the Desert, because she got tired of standing around in ponds waiting for clueless Arthur to take the sword she was holding.  

It is I, Demo's chronicler, who will tell you this tale of high adventure!

Zombie puns

According to Terry Pratchett, the pun, or pune as it is correctly spelled, was named after Jean-Paul Pune, the founder of the Fools Guild in the Discworld


Alien Rage

A recent study estimates that more than half of all UFO drivers have experienced a surge of alien abduction rage at some point. The root cause is overcrowding--there are far more aliens out there abducting humans than ever before. Crowding causes aggression.

--Adapted from an article by Jean Lawrence on WebMd. The author was discussing something completely different, but that doesn't matter.


Candy-House Frog

Smart frogs have learned that this old line doesn't work very well anymore, so now they call themselves avatars and offer castles in the metaverse, but, really, a frog is still a frog, and a kiss is still a kiss.

Toys That Failed

 Ours not to reason why....


Junk Dragon

The Junk Dragon's only natural enemies are Recycling Monsters. Junk Dragons will never attack you, unless they want to.




Birds on a computer monitor can change a cat from domestic to feral in the blink of an eye. Once a hunter, always a hunter. 


Viking Neighbors

 Vikings with longships make good neighbours, as long as you don't tell them about any condominium rules, such as only one pet is allowed, or no hurling axes at anyone telling you to keep the noise down, or empty beer kegs are not to be tossed from the balcony.

Unfinished Business

 Some people think we live in a simulation; others think we only imagine we exist. And a few enthusiasts think we live in a model railroad. The truth is, we--oops, have to go now. I'll be back!


Feeding the Birds

 When the snow is firm and crisp and even, it's an act of kindness to feed the birds. After all, you don't want to be on the menu, do you?


I Married a Rhino

Love is blind, for about ten minutes!


Sumo Husband

 Wrestling is in my blood, but my family is in my heart.

--Hulk Hogan

How to be a Vegetarian

 A vegetable garden in the beginning looks so promising and then, after all, little by little it grows nothing but vegetables, nothing, nothing but vegetables.

--Gertrude Stein


The Mad Botanist

Spring planting season will soon be upon us. Dr. Basher's Nursery has some very special items for discerning gardeners who wish to take over the world.




Never leave your UFO unlocked in your driveway, especially if there are cats in the neighborhood.

Sketched on my iPhone in Pocket Procreate, using a Dimples Excel stylus. 



Polishing Your Image

You got to accentuate the positive

Eliminate the negative

And latch onto the affirmative

Don't mess with Mr. In-between....

--Arlen, Mercer



Cat Trick

Redrawn and colored on my iPad Mini 6, converted to a jpeg in Affinity Photo, mixed in a bowl with icing sugar, spread thickly on a chocolate cake, decorated with Conan the Barbarian emojis and photographed and written up in The Great Big Platinum Book of Things to Do With Your iPad Mini.